What to do if You’re Being Stalked

What to do if You're Being Stalked Review

Understanding Stalking and How to Deal With It

Being stalked is a frightening and distressing experience. Stalking can happen to anyone, and it is important to take it seriously and seek help immediately. In this “What to do if You’re Being Stalked” blog post, We’ll discuss what to do if you are being stalked and provide some practical tips on how to stay safe.

What is Stalking?

restraining order

Stalking is a pattern of unwanted and obsessive behavior directed toward another person. This behavior can include following the victim, making unwanted phone calls/texts or sending unwanted emails, pictures, or messages, sending unwanted gifts, or damaging the victim’s property. The stalker may also threaten or make the victim feel unsafe.

Stalking is a serious crime; taking action is important if you feel you are being stalked. Stalking can significantly impact a person’s mental health, and seeking help as soon as possible is important.

What to Do if You are Being Stalked

woman being harassed

Taking immediate action to protect yourself is important if you are being stalked. First, trust your instincts and take any threats or unwanted behavior seriously. Keep a record of any instances of stalking, including dates, times, and details of what happened. Notify law enforcement and seek assistance from trusted friends, family members, or professionals, such as victim advocates or therapists.

Consider obtaining a restraining order, which can prohibit your stalker from contacting or coming near you. Remember that you have the right to feel safe and secure; resources are available to help you navigate this difficult situation.

Take the Stalking Seriously

Stalking is a serious crime and can escalate quickly, posing a significant threat to your safety and well-being. Even if the behavior seems harmless initially, it’s important to trust your instincts and take action to protect yourself. By taking the situation seriously and seeking help, you can take steps to regain control of your life and protect yourself from harm.

Boyfriend stalking ex

Keep a Record of the Stalking Behavior

If you are being stalked, keeping a record of incidents or behaviors that make you feel uncomfortable or threatened is essential. This can help you build a case against your stalker and provide evidence to law enforcement. Keep a journal or logbook of incidents, including dates, times, and details of what happened. Save any voicemails, emails, notes, letters, pictures, or messages from your stalker, and take screenshots of any online activity.

judge ruling on restraining order

If your stalker sends you gifts or letters, keep them in a safe place and don’t throw them away. You should also document any witnesses to the stalking behavior and their contact information. Remember that your record-keeping should be detailed, factual, and objective. Avoid making assumptions or judgments about your stalker’s motives or intentions. By keeping a record of the stalking behavior, you can take an important

step in protecting yourself and holding your stalker accountable for their actions.

Tell Someone

Tell someone you trust. This could be a friend, family member, coworker, or professional. Telling someone about the stalking behavior can help you feel less alone and more supported. It can also provide an opportunity to discuss your options and develop a safety plan.

woman telling family about being stalked

Don’t be afraid to ask for help or support – this is not a situation you should handle alone. If you feel uncomfortable telling someone you know, consider contacting a local advocacy group or national helpline for confidential support and guidance. Remember that telling someone about the stalking behavior is not a sign of weakness – it’s a brave and proactive step towards protecting yourself and taking control of the situation.

Contact the Police

If you feel that you are in immediate danger, contact the police. The police can help you to stay safe and may be able to take action against the stalker if there is no time for the police to move to a crowded area, fire station, hospital, or somewhere with abundant people as witnesses or help.

Get a Restraining Order

If you’re being stalked, it’s important to contact the police. Stalking is a serious crime that can escalate quickly and pose a significant threat to your safety. By notifying law enforcement; you can record the stalking behavior and begin taking steps to protect yourself. When you contact the police, provide them with as much information as possible, including a description of the stalker, any evidence you have collected, and details of any threats or harassing behavior.

The police may also be able to help you obtain a restraining order, which can provide additional legal protections and consequences if the order is violated. Remember that reporting the stalking behavior to the police can be a difficult and emotional process. Still, taking control of the situation and protecting yourself from harm is important.

woman filing restraining order

The restraining order is just another step in the process and will help in the future of building a case against your stalker. Remember though it is a legal order for the stalker to stay away from you, it is not a physical barrier or shield that will do that. Getting a restraining order is not the magical paper to keep the stalker away. Restraining orders have also been known to escalate a stalker’s insistence on seeing, meeting, or being with you. Use it as another level of protection, but don’t rely on it to protect you.

Take Steps to Protect Yourself

It’s important to take steps to protect yourself. This can include changing your phone number or email address, varying your routines, and securing your home and belongings. Consider installing a security system, changing your locks, or adding extra lighting around your home. You may also want to carry a personal alarm or pepper spray for protection. It’s important to prioritize your safety and take precautions to minimize your risk of harm. If you feel uncomfortable or threatened in any situation, trust your instincts and take action to remove yourself from the situation. Remember that you have the right to feel safe and secure; resources are available to help you protect yourself and navigate this difficult situation.

Seek Support

Seek support from a professional, such as a victim advocate or therapist. Stalking can significantly impact your mental health and well-being, and taking care of yourself during this difficult time is important. A victim advocate can provide support, information, and resources to help you navigate the legal and emotional aspects of stalking behavior.

stalker victim talking to counselor

A therapist can provide a safe and supportive space to process emotions and develop coping strategies. You may also want to consider joining a support group for victims of stalking, which can provide a sense of community and validation. Remember that seeking support is not a sign of weakness – it’s a proactive step towards taking care of yourself and regaining control of your life.

Get physically fit and join a support group like a martial arts or self-defense school.

Yes, it is long-term, and not an instant fix, but the training and exercise you will receive will build your confidence. Building confidence in this way changes you in ways that others can see, less of an easy target and someone sure of themselves. You will learn to be more situationally aware and other useful tactics to avoid or take care of conflicts.

Vary Your Routine

Vary your routine as much as possible. Stalkers often rely on predictability and routine to monitor their victims. Changing your daily habits can make it harder for them to track you.

This includes taking a different route to work or school, switching up the times you go to the gym or grocery store, or changing your regular hangout spots. Be mindful of your online activity as well – consider changing your passwords. In addition, increase your privacy settings and avoid posting location-specific information on social media. Remember that varying your routine can feel inconvenient or disruptive, but protecting yourself and minimizing your risk of harm is important.

Stay Alert

woman distracted on cell phone

Stay alert and aware of your surroundings. This day and age of smartphones is a stalkers/predator’s dream, don’t be so engrossed in your phone that you are not paying attention. Headphones and earbuds are almost as bad; you cannot hear what’s happening around you. If you are walking or running out in public, a good practice is only to use one earbud or headphone so you can hear. Be mindful of unusual or suspicious behavior, and trust your instincts if you feel uncomfortable or threatened.

Consider carrying a personal alarm or pepper spray, and make sure your phone is easily accessible in an emergency. Be aware of escape routes and safe places to go if you feel threatened or need to call for help. Stay connected with friends and family and tell them where you are and when you expect to return. Remember that staying alert can feel exhausting or overwhelming, but it’s important to protect yourself and stay safe. Traveling with a friend is always a good idea, especially in places that are not high-traffic.

Keep Your Home Secure

Keeping your home as secure as possible is important if you’re being stalked. This can include installing a security system, changing your locks, and adding extra lighting around your property. Security cameras and systems are inexpensive now, and most can be run and viewed via your smartphone without needing to go to the door or your home if you are out. Consider trimming any overgrown bushes or trees that could provide cover for a stalker. In addition, avoid leaving spare keys or other entry points accessible.

home security

If you live in an apartment building or shared housing, be mindful of who has access to the building. Get to know your neighbors; the sense of community has been dwindling. If you are not just another person to them, they are more likely to want to help you in your time of need. Knowing your neighbors and what they drive will quickly help you figure out who and what belongs in your area; this also goes for homeowners. Add additional security measures like a deadbolt or chain lock to your door. Always lock your doors and windows, and consider investing in a doorbell or security camera system. Keeping your home secure can help you feel safer and more in control during a difficult and unsettling time.

Avoid contact with the Stalker

Avoid contact with the stalker as much as possible. Try blocking their phone number, email, and social media accounts and avoiding places you know they’re likely to be. If you see the stalker in public, do not engage with them. Try to remove yourself from the situation as quickly and safely as possible. Avoid responding to any attempts at contact or communication, and do not meet with the stalker alone or in a private location.

Remember that stalking is unacceptable, and you have the right to protect yourself. If the stalker continues to pursue you despite your attempts to avoid them, seek help from law enforcement and a victim advocate immediately.

Travel with a Companion

Traveling with a companion whenever possible is a good idea if you’re being stalked. Having a trusted friend or family member with you can provide security and support and help deter a stalker from approaching you. If you must travel alone, consider letting someone know your travel plans and checking in with them regularly.

Avoid traveling alone at night or in isolated areas, and always be mindful of your surroundings. If you feel uncomfortable or threatened, seek help immediately and consider contacting law enforcement. Remember that traveling with a companion can help you feel safer and more in control.

Seek Professional Help

If you’re being stalked, seeking professional help is important in protecting yourself and regaining control over your life. Contact a therapist or counselor specializing in trauma, domestic violence, or stalking. They can provide a safe and supportive environment for you to process your experiences, develop coping strategies, and create a safety plan. They can also help you address any anxiety, depression, or other emotional distress from stalking behavior.

anxiety and depression counseling

Consider contacting a victim advocate or support group for additional resources and support. Remember that seeking professional help is a sign of strength and self-care. Further, it can be crucial in healing and moving forward.

How to Deal With A Stalker Conclusion

woman being stalked

Being stalked can be a frightening and overwhelming experience. Remember, you can take steps to protect yourself and regain control of your life.

It’s important to trust your instincts, document all instances of stalking, and seek help from trusted friends, family members, or professionals. You can reclaim peace and move forward confidently by acting and advocating for yourself.

What to do if You’re Being Stalked FAQs

What should I do if I’m being stalked?

If you’re being stalked, it’s important to take action to protect yourself. Document all instances of stalking, notify the police, and seek help from trusted friends, family members, or professionals.

How do I know if I’m being stalked?

Stalking can take many forms. Some common signs include unwanted contact, surveillance or following, gifts or messages, and threats of harm or violence.

Should I confront my stalker?

It’s generally not recommended to confront your stalker directly, as this can escalate the situation and put you in danger. Instead, seek help from law enforcement or other professionals trained to handle these situations.

Can I get a restraining order against my stalker?

Yes, you may be able to obtain a restraining order against your stalker. This legal document can prohibit your stalker from contacting or coming near you. They will also provide additional protections and consequences if the order is violated.

What if I’m afraid to report my stalker?

It’s understandable to feel afraid or hesitant to report your stalker but remember that you have the right to be safe and secure. Resources are available to help you navigate this difficult situation and protect yourself.

Can stalking be a criminal offense?

Yes, stalking is a criminal offense in many jurisdictions. Depending on the severity and frequency of the stalking behavior, your stalker may be subject to criminal prosecution and penalties.


  • Dennis Rousseau

    Mr. Rousseau is a former Army infantryman where he learned hand-to-hand combat, squad tactics, close quarter battle training, and multiple weapon platforms. He has deployed to Iraq and is an Operation Desert Storm Veteran.

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